Chapter 2 Page 52

Break, broke, broken.
I found a new crush like 2 weeks ago. A junior. He's charm as prince, of course you know that charm prince is my type. I know his name because my classmate is his senior at photography club. She said that he didn't have a girlfriend, good news right? I have a chance, I thought so.
Today, as usual, me and my friends went to the canteen for lunch. I'm so excited to see him if we meet, just saw him from the distance is enough for me. But my friends keep telling me that I should introduce myself to him. Screw that, I'm not ready yet! When one of my friend called him, I just sat and keep holding my food and ate pieces by pieces. She called me to come to her and that junior. There's my junior's friends staring and laughing at us. The junior tried to hide his face from me and my friends. His friends yelled that he already have a girlfriend. Stabbed my heart for a moment. I heard his girlfriend is a cute one, can't compared with me. I know I'm unactractive, I was nothing. Finally, I didn't do anything. Ok. This was embrassing moment and hurts either. Kill me.
So....... I thought that I was ready for a new love, I think that I can get over this junior, but I was wrong. I'm still a baby chick. Haven't grown yet. I'm still afraid and easily get hurts. I never have a chance to have a relationship with someone I love, but I already had enough pain that keeps make me afraid to fall for someone.
It's enough for now. I won't love someone again for a moment, until it comes naturally.